DiGiorno, purveyors of fine frozen pizzas, have added a few new, flashy products to their pizza boxes.
Cookies, which I presume are not intended to be a topping, and something they call “WYNGZ,” which are chicken products to cook alongside the pizza.
This bothered me in two regards – as a journalism student, I object to that absurd spelling, and as a foodie, I object to whatever it is that a wyngz is (not sure if that is the singular spelling, but I’ll go with it for now).
So what the heck is a wyngz? According to DiGiorno, they use the spelling “wyngz” because, and I quote, “they’re not wings. They’re even better.”
“Wyngz,” in reality, are probably not better (if you’re into chicken wings). They are, according to the USDA, who regulates this sort of thing, “a product that is in the shape of a wing or a bite-size appetizer type product under the following conditions…”
- It can’t contain any real wing meat.
- It has to be white meat.
- No other misspellings are permitted.
Read the USDA’s full definition here.
This brings up all sorts of questions – like, how much taxpayer money is spent on the definition and regulation of wyngz? And why would DiGiorno want to sell them instead of “wings”? And do they grow on chykenz?
Stephen Colbert recently had a little fun at Digornio’s expense in his non-weekly word of the week segment, and I don’t blame him. If you put out a product like that, you’ve got to expect a little backlash.
As he put it, “It’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno. And it’s not wings, it’s wyngz.” Touche.
Because Comedy Central doesn’t allow its videos on YouTube and WordPress doesn’t allow flash videos on their sites, I have no way of posting the video. But I’ll link to it here – it’s definitely worth a watch.